1. What do you get if you cross some ants with some tics?
Ans. All sorts of antics.

2. What do you call a greedy ant?
Ans. An anteater.

3. What has 3 tails, 4 trunks, and 6 feet?
Ans. An elephant with spare parts.

4. What is grey but turns red?
Ans. An embarrassed elephant.

5. What kind of dog does a vampire perfer?
Ans. Any kind of bloodhound.

6. What kind of dog sniff out new flowers?
Ans. A bud hound.

7. What do you get if you cross a teddy bear and a pig?
Ans. A teddy boar.

8. What animal do you look like when you get into a bath?
Ans. A little bear.

9. Who write books for little bees?
Ans. Bee-trix Potter.

10. Where do bees go on holiday?
Ans. Stingapore.

11. What do you call a bee that has had a spell put on him?
Ans. Bewitched.

12. What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea?
Ans. It gets wet.

13. Why can't a man living in Mexico be buried in Canada?
Ans. He is still living.

14. Why did the man take a ruler to bed with him?
Ans. He wanted to see how long he slept.

15. How do you buy a thundercloud?
Ans. With a rain check.

16. What is the best thing to put in a pizza?
Ans. Your teeth.

17. Why do leaves change their color before Halloween?
Ans. They want to get their costumes ready early.

18. What kind of dog says meow?
Ans. A police dog working undercover.

19. What did the plant say to the gardener?
Ans. Take me to your weeder.

20. What is another name for a vampire dog?
Ans. A bloodhound.

21. What do you call a teeter totter for donkeys?
Ans. A hee haw seesaw.

22. What still crawls at age five?
Ans. A snake.

23. Why did the elephant put his trunk across the path?
Ans. To trip up the ants.

24. What is even bigger than an elephant?
Ans. A giant.

25. What do you call an ant in space?
Ans. Cosmonants and Astronants.

26. What do you call an ant from overseas?
Ans. Impartant.

27. What kind of meat do you give a stupid dog?
Ans. Chump chops.

28. Why is it called a litter of puppies?
Ans. They mess up the whole house if allowed to.

29. What is a black dog not a black dog?
Ans. When it is a greyhound.

30. What do you get if you cross a skunk and a bear?
Ans. Winnie the Pooh.

31. What do you call an ant that likes to be alone?
Ans. Independant.

32. Where do ants go out to eat?
Ans. Restaurant.

33. What do you call an ant with frog legs?
Ans. Antphibian.

34. What do you call a beautiful ant?
Ans. Elegant.

35. Why is a polar bear a cheap pet to have?
Ans. It lives on ice.

36. What is a bear's favorite drink?
Ans. Koka Koala.

37. Why was the little bear so spoiled?
Ans. Its mother panda'd its every whim.

38. Who is the bee's favorite singer?
Ans. Sting.

39. Who are the bees favorite rock group?
Ans. The Bee Gees.

40. What does a queen bee do when she burps?
Ans. Issues a royal pardon.

41. Where do Eskimos train their dogs?
Ans. In the mush room.

42. Why did the snowman call his dog Frost?
Ans. Cause frost bites.

43. Why don't dogs make good dancers?
Ans. They have two left feet.

44. What is a dog's favorite sport?
Ans. Formula 1 drooling.

45. What do mermaids use for money?
Ans. Sand dollars.

46. What train do sheep ride on?
Ans. Ramtrack.

47. How do you clean ice off of a tall building?
Ans. Use a sky scraper.

48. What is the difference between an oak tree and a tight shoe?
Ans. One makes acorns and the other makes corns ache.

49. What grows shorter as it lives longer?
Ans. A pencil.

50. How does a dog earn a living?
Ans. By picking up scents. Show your love for God through all your actions and words today and every day. God Bless You.

51. What do mice celebrate when they move home?
Ans, With a mouse warming party.

52. Where do hamsters come from?
Ans. Hamsterdam.

53. What is a mouse's least favorite record?
Ans. "What's Up Pussycat.

54. Why do mice need oiling?
Ans. They squeak.

55. What kind of musical instrument do mice play?
Ans. A mouse organ.

56. What did the calculator say to the student?
Ans. You can count on me.

57. What do you get when you eat crackers in bed?
Ans. Crumby night's sleep.

58. How do monsters tell their future?
Ans. They read their horror-scopes.

59. Why shouldn't you step on a watch?
Ans. It's a waste of time.

60. Where does a sock go when it loses its partner?
Ans. To the repair shop.

61. Why did the ghost starch his sheet?
Ans. He wanted to scare people stiff.

62. What do you call a dog's kiss?
Ans. A Pooch smooch.

63.What can go a thousand miles yet never move?
Ans. A road.

64. What is the happiest state?
Ans. Maryland.

65. What do you call a boy with a dictionary in his pocket?
Ans. A smarty pants.

66. What do you do when your tooth falls out?
Ans. Get the toothpaste.

67. How did the knife beat the fork home?
Ans. He took a short cut.

68. What can't be used until it is broken?
Ans. An egg.

69. What do cats call their grandfather?
Ans. Grandpaws.

70. Why can't you bring a chicken to school?
Ans. It might use fowl language.

71. Why aren't robots ever afraid?
Ans. They have nerves of steel.

72. What is better than a dog that can count?
Ans. A spelling bee.

73. What bird never misses a meal?
Ans. A swallow.

74. Why was the ghost so lonely?
Ans. He had no body.

75. What is the easiest way to catch a fish?
Ans. Have someone throw one to you.

76. Why do witches fly on brooms?
Ans. It beats walking.

77. What letters are not in the alphabet?
Ans. Those that come in the mail.

78. Why is six afraid of seven?
Ans. Seven eight nine.

79. Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Ans. It was feeling crumby.

80. How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
Ans. There hasn't been a rabbit wearing glasses.

81. What do you call a pony with a sore throat?
Ans. A little hoarse.

82. What do you call cheese that is not yours?
Ans. Nacho Cheese.

83. What streets do ghosts haunt?
Ans. Dead ends.

84. What is the astronaut's favorite key on a computer?
Ans. The space bar.

85. What exam do young witches have to pass?
Ans. A spell-ing test.

86. Why did the boy eat his homework?
Ans. The teacher said it was a piece of cake.

87. Why is basketball such a messy sport?
Ans. You dribble on the floor.

88. What did Santa say when his toys misbehaved?
Ans. Toys will be toys.

89. If Santa rode a motorcycle what kind would it be?
Ans. A Holly Davidson.

90. Where do computers go to dance?
Ans. A disc-o.

91. What did the vacuum say to the broom?
Ans. Why don't people quit pushing me around?

92. What do you do with a blue whale?
Ans. Cheer it up.

93. Why are fish poor tennis players?
Ans. They don't want to get too close to the net.

94. What do you go at red and stop at green?
Ans. When eating watermelon.

95. How did the boy unlock to door to the beach?
Ans. He used the Florida Keys.

96. What is a llama's favorite food?
Ans. Llama beans.

97. What do you call a lazy butcher?
Ans. A meat loafer.

98. How do slugs begin their fair tales?
Ans. Once upon a slime.

99. What do you call a sick tree?
Ans. A sickamore.

100. What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
Ans. Do you believe in people?